Jaren's thoughts

READ ME

2011-09-22T01:58:00.003-06:00

Dear friends,

This blog I feel has served it's purpose. I feel that the inspirations that are now coming into my life are far too sacred to write in such a public forum. For this reason I have decided to take somewhat of a leave of absence from this blog. I am not about the general inspiration of others. I am not all about the inspiration of specific individuals. If you have a desire to be one of those individuals and this blog has touched you, I invite you to come to me. I have a message for you.. but that message is ONLY for you. I promise that those of you who accept this invitation and come with ears to hear, your life will change. I love you all and I appreciate all the support over the years.

All my love,

Jaren James

Progess

2011-09-01T17:15:00.002-06:00

I am amazed as I look back over this blog to see the progress that has taken place in my life. I now have eyes to see and can see that there were some thinking errors involved in the problems I was having. I realize that it was my victim mentality that kept me stuck for so many years. I am so blessed to have received all the guidance that I have from the Lord and my friends. I can truly say that I have come to know MY Savior. He is real. I have watched the scriptures come to life right in front of me. I spoke with a friend of mine last night about scripture study. I would like to share something that I shared with her last night. My friends, get the message that the Lord is trying to convey when you read. There is always a message. The message oft times has nothing to do with what they story is talking about. For example, I prayed to the Lord about moving to Hawaii a few years back. After telling the Lord my plan I decided to go ahead since I had not received any definitive answer. One night I was in my room alone and I got the impression to read a talk by President Monson. To this day I have no idea what that talk was even about.. but I got the message the Lord was sending to me. He told me, clear as day, that I was NOT to move to Hawaii. Nowhere in that talk was that message written. The principle, my friends, is obedience. If we honestly seek the Lord's will.. He will show it to us. I love that principle. D&C 82:10 "I the Lord am bound when ye do what I say. When ye do not what I say ye have no promise." It is that simple. The Lord wants to show you the mysteries of His kingdom. He wants you to obtain all that he has. Get the message. Is the Lord trying to send you a message right now? I mean right in this very moment as you are reading this.. Listen. The Lord has a plan for YOU. He loves you. Let him bless your life. I love you all. If any of you have something to say, please add your comments. I would love to hear your experiences. No individual's experience is greater than another's. Please do not be afraid to share. You can also share privately to my email (hyperlite182@gmail.com) or if you have a message you would like to send to others but remove your name I believe you can post here anonymously. Look forward to hearing from you.

Life is PERFECT

2011-08-28T23:37:00.003-06:00

My friends.. Life is perfect. No matter where you are, no matter what your situation, no matter how sinful or clean your life is, life is perfect. I love where I am right now. I have never felt so happy and I have never felt so successful. I am exactly as I should be exactly where I should be. Thank you to all of those that have made this possible. If you think you played a part, you did. If you don't think you played a part, well, you did. I want you all to know how much I love the Lord. He is my everything. He is the reason I wake up in the morning. The only real reason for living. My great friend Jeff Dinsdale said something about me today that was one of the great compliments I have received in my life. Jeff said that the gospel runs through my veins. If you were to cut me open I would bleed truth. I truly believe this is true. I bleed truth. Every breath I take is truth. I am exactly where I need to be. My life is PERFECT. I am PERFECT. The Lord made me perfectly. What a blessing. My friends, I invite you to come unto the Lord. Pray. Read your scriptures. Teach your friends. Don't be afraid and don't live the gospel half way. You know better. I have so much love for each of you individually. I love hearing your comments and experiences so please keep sharing them. Much love my friends. You are PERFECT. CTCTW.

CTCTW

2011-08-20T22:49:00.002-06:00

My friends, it has been too long. I appreciate all of those that have followed me over the years since I started this blog. You may never know the impact that your influence has had on my life. I would love to thank each one of you individually and I will take that opportunity if it comes, if not, please take this as your own personal thank you. Now, I have a lot that I need to share. There is so much in my life that you all don't know. I am not so sure that it is any specific event or anything like that. It is more me changing and growing and learning. If you have been away from me for more than about a month.. you are more than likely completely out of the loop. I invite you to come to know me. Now, this invitation requires work. I am willing and committed to each of you and I will be making contact with many of you as you pop into my head. I have already begun doing this and it has served me, and the other individual, quite well. My heart has been changed. I am a different man today than I have ever been before. I cannot share all that I want to on this blog. Now is not the time. But I will say that I will be blogging more often as I feel the time is right to do so. You all have my word on that. My word in the past was not so great. But today, I am my word. I will not let you down. All my love goes out to you all. If you do not know what CTCTW stands for... well, maybe the curiosity will be enough for you to contact me about it. I love you. May the Lord smile great blessings upon you all.

I'm back

2010-12-07T01:20:00.002-07:00

Well, many things have happened as of late that have been life changing. I recently lost my job which I had for 3 1/2 years. I loved working for Telos and I am very grateful for the experience. I certainly took that job for granted and especially the money for granted. I made some good money there. I am now on the search for a new job and I am hoping to find one that will allow me to focus more on school. I recognize that I will most likely sacrifice money, but I need to be able to focus on my school work. Speaking of school, much has changed in that department as well. I am now back to my original plan. I am going to dental school and I am going to be an orthodontist. I am very excited and I feel this is the way that I need to be going. Also, I have made some new friends and I have rid myself of old ones that were not good influences in my life. I needed this fresh start. So, as I sit here I am reminded that I have so much. At times it is interesting to sit and look at where your life is and how you got there. I was so caught up in my life and all the worries. It is nice to have some time to think again and just remember what is most important. My family. My friends. My future. Being happy. Being clean. I am now refocused on the temple. I am excited to get back into a normal routine of attendance. I have missed the temple a great deal. It has left quite the void in my life and I want to fill it again. I suppose this is not going to be much of an inspiring entry, but it is for me. Looking back to where I was a few months ago, I have improved a great deal. I was not sure that I was going to live til tomorrow back when. Today I look forward to tomorrow and can look back on today with a smile. I am grateful for the gospel in my life. I am not yet where I want to be, but I am on my way. I am excited just to be on my way. I guess you can say I am enjoying the journey on the path back. I am not perfect, but I am able to forgive myself. I am getting better every day. I am back to being me again. I am looking to help others again. I am looking to be a support and a light in the lives of others. It's good to be me again. Slowly I am transforming and changing into the man I am supposed to become. It is basic, but it is crucial. Thanks to all of you who have helped me. Adam, Sonny, Victoria, Blake, Chris, Aimmie, Dad, Mom, Kaylese, Derek, Bishop, Chelsea, and everyone else, thank you. I love you all very, very much.

"Raising the Bar: Missionaries to Match the Message"

2010-10-19T00:46:00.002-06:00

This entry is to those of you who are missionaries. If you think that you are excluded from this group because you did not serve a mission, think again. A wise man that I respect dearly once gave a talk that I am eternally grateful for. The talk was entitled "Raising the Bar: Missionaries to Match the Message". The man who gave the talk was Ed J. Pinegar. In this talk President Pinegar relates a story in which he was asked, "Where did you serve your mission?" He responded, "Earth. Earth is my mission". I laughed when I heard this because I thought it was cheesy, but he has a great outlook on his life. He is here to serve the Lord. He did not lose the title of "missionary" when he took of his plaque. The name of Jesus Christ was not just pinned to his coat, it was written on his heart. Those of us who have not served full time missions and those who have served full time missions, we are all here to serve a REAL full time mission. We need to have the Savior's name written on our hearts. We need to serve Him in every capacity. I am grateful for the opportunity to serve Him. I love Jesus Christ. He is my master and my best friend. Unfortunately for me I have left His side a few times and for that I have suffered. I am working my way back now and I look forward to serving Him in the temple again. To those of you who are struggling, I want to pass on a lesson that I learned from a wonderful friend of mine. You need to act like a Sister Missionary.. get a blessing.. in fact, get a lot of blessings. The Lord wants to help you, use the resources he has provided. I am grateful for worthy priesthood holders who are willing and worthy to perform these blessings. The Lord is King. I am but a humble servant. You are loved.

Whatever it takes

2010-09-26T03:49:00.004-06:00

As many may know, I have been in a very rough spot the last few months. The adjustment to the love of my life being gone and all the other stresses that come with life have proven to be too much for me. I am in one of the deepest depressions of my life. As I sit here I wonder how this has happened? Where did I go wrong? How did I let it get this bad. A few things have come to mind when I think back on these last few months. First, I realize that I was not prepared in the slightest for Kellyn to leave. She was LITERALLY my LIFE. Without her I have NO LIFE. There in lies the biggest problem. I should not have put all of my eggs in one basket. Realizing this I have noticed that my relationship with my Heavenly Father has diminished greatly. That is where the real trouble begins. The lack of communication with and lack of respect for the Lord is my biggest downfall. Coupled with pride and grievous sin I feel sorrow. Immense amounts of sorrow. I feel that I have fallen to a place where there is little hope. So now what? Where do I go from here? Can I get back what I lost? Is there hope for a wretched soul such as mine? The answer is a resounding YES! I know that there is ALWAYS hope. I need to be willing to put in the leg work. I need to be willing to do WHATEVER IT TAKES. If I am not willing to do so then I will not make it. So, the message that I share this morning is one of hope and one of sobering reality. There are times in our lives where we have to do as the Lord has said, "Gird up {our} loins and fresh courage take". Brothers and Sisters, today is the day. Do not wait another minute. I am hopeful and for that, all glory be to the Father of my spirit. WHATEVER IT TAKES.

Thoughts I'm thinkin

2010-07-24T21:03:00.002-06:00

It has been some time. I think I am going to start to write here more often again. I really like the way my life goes when I am writing about it. Well, as of late things have been different. Kellyn is finally on her mission, and needless to say, I really miss her. She is the most wonderful woman I have ever known. I really lover her and I am so grateful for her example. This week I have the opportunity to give a talk in church. As I was preparing my talk I thought about my testimony (my topic is testimony). I thought about how much has gone into developing my testimony. I have experienced a great deal in my life up to this point. Some of the things have been tough to deal with and others have been the joy of my life. No matter what the experience I am grateful for them all. The current challenge of Kellyn being so far away is a new one for me. I have never cared so much for a person and not be able to communicate with them. I talked to her every day before she left! Ah! I can't wait to receive her letters! I know that no matter how this whole thing ends up it will be the will of the Lord. I need to have faith in that. I got to see my family recently and that was such a wonderful experience. Leaving them could be one of the hardest things ever, but I know that I am where I need to be. Man, I am just so blessed in my life. I can't believe how wonderful my life has become. I am The Luckiest.

Ongoing Miracles

2010-05-09T01:00:00.002-06:00

Wow.. Sometimes life just hits you with stuff.. ya know? I had one of the toughest weeks of my life. I have never had to deal with so much stuff all at once. I am grateful that I have so many wonderful people around me. I love having the opportunity to call upon a friend when I am in need. Also, I witnessed a few miracles this week. First, the miracle of Milo Miner. Milo is the new born son (May 3, 2010) of my best friend Adam Miner. Holding that little boy in my arms and looking at his perfect face made the world change for me. It was as if I just saw my second nephew. He was sent to the Miner family as a blessing and an answer to prayers. What a difference his presence in the Miner home has made on the whole family. I can see that life has changed for them forever. Second miracle was when I saw my friend Kim's baby girl. She was born on May 1, 2010. She is the spitting image of her older sister. What an amazing spirit that little girl has. The glow that was about Kim's face was bright enough to light the room. I am so pleased for the Brimhall family. The third miracle I witnessed in my life as of late was the miracle of a priesthood blessing that I received. In my blessing there were some specific things said that changed my life. More important than the things that were said was the feeling that I had and the testimony that was borne of the priesthood. The bonding moment that I shared with Adam after the blessing is something that will never go away. I love the way the spirit can bring two people together. I was amazed. If it weren't for these miracles in my life this week would have been too much for me to handle. I thank the Lord for ongoing miracles.

Understanding the Atonement

2010-03-27T00:20:00.002-06:00

I once heard from a very wise stake president that we will never fully understand the Atonement. I was very confused by his statement because I thought that I had a pretty good testimony of the Atonement and I felt that in a few short years I would have it figured out. Well, here I am a few short years later and I have just learned something new about the Atonement. I have learned that the Atonement is for me. Now, that may seem to be a very plain truth. In reality, however, it is very complex for me. I have realized how personal the Atonement really is. It is not just Christ suffered for mankind and we need to use that Atonement to get back to Heaven. Christ suffered for ME. Individually. Just me alone. Not for everyone else. Just me. Then he went along and suffered for another person. Individually. Just them alone. Not for anyone else. Then the next person and so on. I was actually on the Savior's mind and he saw me in all actuality and suffered for just me. This concept has brought a whole new meaning to the Atonement. I am so insignificant, but there is nothing more important to the Lord than my soul. That may sound like a contradiction, but it makes perfect sense. I challenge you to ponder on this topic. Think about the Savior suffering for you alone and no one else. See how that changes your life. I hope it changes yours like it has mine. I look forward to learning more about the Atonement. How exciting it is to know that I will never understand it all. That means that I can learn about it for the rest of my life and never run out of things to learn! What an awesome experience. I am truly blessed. I love my Savior Jesus Christ.

It's hard

2010-02-06T02:01:00.002-07:00

I have been having a hard time as of late. Things are just plain hard. I am trying to stay strong and fight temptation. I am trying to move on even though Kellyn has moved away so that she can serve her mission. I am trying to keep up with school even though it is stressful and expensive. I am trying to be a good friend to others who have difficulty in their lives. But you know, it's hard. I want to be married. I want to have Kellyn back. I don't want to have to do all of this stuff alone. I feel really alone. I realize that feeling alone means that I am not turning to the Lord enough. Because if I turn to Him then I never feel alone. So I am taking this opportunity, while things are hard, to catch myself and turn to the one who understands me best. After all, He is the one who has brought all this hard stuff into my life. I know that He knows how to help me through it all. He will provide a way for it all to be accomplished. I am not sure how that will be however. I am going to hold on. I am going to make it. With my eyes on the prize. I am worth it. I will not let the adversary tear me down. This is a fight I am not willing to lose. I choose to win. Glory be to the Most High.

Does He know you love Him?

2010-01-27T01:35:00.002-07:00

I got the impression tonight that I needed to write down some of my feelings in this here blog. I ignored the thought the first time and then I had a thought that I just had to write about. A lot of times we think, "Does the Lord really love me?" As I was about to climb in my bed I had an interesting thought that I never really had before. I thought to myself, "I am so glad that my Father knows that I love Him." I have never really thought about the Lord being loved by us and how do we know that the Lord feels our love? So the next time you are wondering if the Lord loves you, think about if He knows you love Him. You will know the Lord loves you if He knows you love Him.

The Temple

2010-01-03T23:53:00.003-07:00

Over the course of my life I have not had too much of an opportunity to attend the temple in my life. I held myself back from the temple for quite some time. I was worried that I would enter unworthily and feel like a sinner and feel like the Lord was going to strike me down. Although it is important to enter the temple when you are worthy and ready to partake in those sacred ordinances, you do not need to be perfect. In my mind I needed to arrive. I needed to have every little thing under control. I thought that if I had one bad thought then I was lusting after a woman in my heart and that I was an adulterer. I have come to realize that the temple is there for those who are striving for perfection, not for the perfect. There are certain requirements that need to be met, but perfection is not one of them. I am excited to use my limited use recommend to do baptisms. I love that I am able to take part in the ordinances of the temple. I also set a date today with my bishop for the receiving of my endowment. Come March 12, 2010 I will be an endowed member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Oh what a blessing it is. I am grateful to all of those that have helped in any way throughout the process. I am especially grateful to my family and my lovely girlfriend Kellyn. If you are struggling with not feeling worthy to enter the temple then ask. Ask the Lord how he feels about it. If there are no things amiss in your life and you just have a hard time making it to the temple... well shame on you! ha ha. Get to the temple! Make time for it in your schedule. Go as often as you can. The temple is there for us to use. It is the house of the Lord. He is there and wants to commune with you. Go to Him and let Him heal you. I love you all!

Kellyn

2009-12-02T20:05:00.002-07:00

I just wanted to take a minute to say thank you to a very sweet girl. Kellyn is the new lady in my life and she has just taught me so much over the past month. It is amazing how meeting one person can change your life so much. She is such a great example to me and she helps me to want to be a better person. I am so grateful for how special she makes me feel. I love that I can be myself and she loves every bit of it. There is nothing like it. So this is for you, Kellyn. I am grateful for you. You are most definitely worth it. :)

The Luckiest

2009-11-09T00:20:00.002-07:00

I just want you all to know that I am The Luckiest. I am the luckiest guy on the face of this earth. I have the most amazing people who surround me. I want all of you who are reading this to know that I love you dearly. You are the reason why my life is so wonderful. Your support has brought me through some of the toughest times of my life. Thank you. Now the real credit goes to the one who made it all possible. The Savior. Jesus Christ literally saved my life. Were it not for the Atonement of the Son of God I would be nothing. My friends, with Heavenly Father I am everything. I stand firm in what I know today. I know that I am worth it. I know that the Lord has forgiven me and I know that I am clean. I am clean! No one can take that away. Those in my past that have judged me, I thank you. You have helped me to be able to stand on my own two feet. You have helped me to become the man that I am now. I did not work as hard as I have for anyone. I did it for me and I did it with the help of the Savior. If you have a similar story to me I congratulate you. I also remind you as I am constantly reminded.. "unto whom much is given, much is required" (D&C 82:3). We owe it all to the Lord. I am pleased to be a servant of my Savior. Though I will never repay my debt, I am having the time of my life trying to pay as much back as possible. To those of you who stand in need of comfort, I am here. I want you to rejoice with me. Let me help you to stand on higher ground. There are blessings that are yours to claim. I want you to have them. My friends, this is a journey that we are all taking together. There isn't a single one of us that is better than the other. You are never too good to reach down to help one in need. The Savior spent his earthly ministry tending to those who made the poorest of choices. Others had difficult situations thrust upon them. Nothing was beyond his reach and that is still the case today. Those who had faith in Christ were healed. Bring your infirmity to the Lord. Whether you chose it or not, He will heal you. You NEED to be healed. Trust in the Lord with all your heart. He never has and never will lead you astray. Please be a friend and if you need a friend, allow someone to be your friend. I am your friend. All glory be to the one who made it all possible. I am The Luckiest.

Sisters

2009-11-07T01:42:00.003-07:00

I feel so much love in my heart. I love the times when I am able to just sit and think about all the awesome things in my life. The Lord has given me so much. I have the most amazing family. I miss them a ton. I especially miss my sisters. Seriously, they are my light. I have never seen anything more beautiful in my life than the beauty that lies in them. Without my sisters I would not be me. I have grown to appreciate their examples in my life. They all have been an example to me in different ways. They have overcome adversity, they have taught me how to laugh, they have shown me what it means to have unconditional love, and best of all they have shown me the divine nature of womanhood. I cannot thank them enough for their love and support. I bear my testimony to the world of "Jaren's Thoughts" fans... It does not matter how old you are. It does not matter how insignificant you think you may be. I testify that you do make a difference. You make a difference in the lives of ALL those around you. I learned this lesson from my sisters. They are true disciples of Jesus Christ... and I want to be just like them.

Living for RIGHT NOW

2009-10-31T02:07:00.003-06:00

So I was going to title this "...just for the sake of writing..." but I decided that is not appropriate for what I want to write about. I feel impressed to write about how important it is to be happy with where you are. Life is a journey; a really fun journey. I am really bad at this actually so don't feel bad if you are not terribly good at being happy with where you are. That being said, I realize how important it is and I see the need for it in my life. I love my friends. I have met some of the most amazing people over the past few months that have really changed my life. They are awesome people that truly love me for me. They don't judge and they are able to put up with all the stupid things I do and say. That is true love. My family is fantastic. I was thinking about my sister Kaylese tonight and I felt a huge smile come across my face followed by tears welling up in my eyes. The thing that shocked me was how familiar that feeling was. I love my family so much. When I think about them I feel so much love. I felt the need to express these things because I am happy to be with my friends in Utah, but I struggle being away from my family and friends in Arizona. Truth be told though... I am happy. I am happy where I am. I have all that I need. What more could a guy ask for? A wife? maybe.... Smile my friends because it's contagious and certainly worth catching.

Follow your heart

2009-10-02T02:27:00.004-06:00

I am amazed again at how well the Lord knows me. He knows what I need and when I need it. I could feel myself starting to slow down in my progression toward eternal happiness and the Lord brought me back. I have realized that it is better to be honest with someone about how you truly feel about them instead of trying to protect them. We as human beings are strong and able to withstand adversity. To try to protect someone from hearing what you truly feel is quite the disservice. I have realized that I do not have to apologize for my true feelings. Proverbs 3:5-6 says this:
5 ¶ ^aTrust in the Lord with all thine ^bheart; and lean not unto thine ^cown ^dunderstanding.

6 In all thy ways ^aacknowledge him, and he shall ^bdirect thy ^cpaths.
I believe that the pursuit of marriage is a divine one and should be guided and sanctioned by the Lord himself. The Lord needs to be your confidant and the guide to who you choose. The Lord has given me impressions as I have met certain people. I can tell that some of them will be life long friends. I had a conversation with a great friend of mine and I was scared to tell her that I was not interested in dating, but I wanted to be friends. I was surprised to hear that she felt the same as me. She said that she realized that our relationship was not supposed to be a romantic one. We have such a strong friend connection that I know we will be friends for life. I now have a renewed sense of my friendships and I am eternally grateful for them. Again I turn to the Lord and place my trust in him.

The past...

2009-09-19T00:54:00.004-06:00

I have been thinking a lot lately about how things have been going so well in my life. I feel like I have been reborn. I have a new desire to help others and I have seen some great opportunities for such. I am concerned, however, that in an effort to help I have actually damaged a friendship that I worked hard to build. I had no intention of damaging the relationship, but I feel that sometimes we cannot control how someone will react to things we say. I feel strange because I feel that maybe I should not have shared so much. At the same time I feel like maybe I shared exactly what needed to be shared. I am very confused. Whatever the case may be, I know that God is in command. The reason I have titled this entry "The past..." is because I want to leave the past the past. I am tired of having my past follow me. It is time to look to my future. That is where the true beauty lies. I see that my future is full of wonderful bumps and obstacles to be overcome. I am excited to meet those obstacles faithfully with my family and friends by my side. I love the Lord. I love his teachings. No matter what anyone says about me, I know that I am clean. CLEAN. N0body can take that from me. So to my past I say, "Good riddance!" and a faithful "Hello" I express to my future.

I LOVE YOU

2009-09-08T02:25:00.000-06:00

Have I told you lately that I love you? I am sorry if I haven't. I may know you very well or maybe we have never met.. but I want you to know, right now, today, that I love you. I LOVE YOU! Have a good day.

D&C 1:27-28

2009-09-05T23:18:00.005-06:00

D&C 1:27-28:

27 "And inasmuch as they sinned they might be ^achastened, that they might ^brepent;

28 And inasmuch as they were ^ahumble they might be made strong, and blessed from on high, and receive ^bknowledge from time to time."

I was reading this passage of scripture tonight and I did what I was instructed to do, and I applied it to my life. My thoughts were that the Lord wants to chasten us only to the point of repentance. Nothing further. The Lord's only goal in chastening us is to get us to the point where we begin the repentance process. The Lord will bring that chastisement in different ways depending on circumstance. It may be as simple as a tiny whisper/thought that we shouldn't stay up so late. Or it may be as outwardly public as an intervention put on by those that love us. Or it may even be as serious as a near death experience. However the Lord needs to get our attention, He will. When we begin to sorrow in our hearts for our sins, the Lord ceases to chastise us. Then as we repent the Lord will ensure that we will be "made strong, (be) blessed from on high, and receive knowledge from time to time" (italics added). The Lord does not promise that we will receive his knowledge every minute of every day after that. We receive knowledge from TIME to TIME. The Lord knows what we need and when we need it. That is why He is Lord and we serve Him. Let us be mindful of who is in charge. He has not and will not ever lead us astray.

Service

2009-08-29T00:38:00.002-06:00

Friends! It has been so long. I am truly sorry that I have not posted in such a long time. That being said, some old ideas and thoughts have been brought to my mind and I thought I would share a little message about it. I have had the opportunity of helping out a girl lately who has a brother who has been struggling. It was a chance meeting with this girl and ever since I met her things have changed for me. I have found myself wrapped up in the service of her and her family. I am beginning to feel a bit selfish actually because my life has been so fantastic. What a blessing it is to serve others. I feel immensely blessed. So for all of those who read this, please don't hesitate to ask for help from others. It brings eternal happiness to those who are able to help. Along with that, if you are normally the one serving others, let someone serve you for a change. They need the blessings too. May the Lord bless your life with the gift of service.

Loneliness

2009-07-11T12:44:00.003-06:00

Have you ever felt lonely? Have you felt like you just aren't meeting people that you can connect with? This has been my life for the last while. I have felt like I am all alone and being the social person I am that has not been easy for me. Last night I was up way too late and I talked to a friend of mine who had just returned from the ER. She helped me a lot with some encouraging words. She reminded me that the Lord has a plan. She reminded me that the Lord has made promises to me and he has not left me without guidance. I immediately thought of my patriarchal blessing. I had not read it in so long. As I woke up today I decided that I needed to read it. It took me a while to find it because I just moved and it was buried in the bottom of a box, but I found it. When I read it I felt an immediate peace. My thoughts turned to the Lord. I thought about all the tools that I have to make sure that I am on the right path. I thought about all the ways the Lord lets me know that he is near. Prayer, scriptures, patriarchal blessings, Ensign, Jaren's blog, etc. Ok maybe Jaren's blog was a bit of a stretch, but it was worth a shot. The Lord sent us to this earth to be tested, but he did not send us alone. He gave us one another, but more importantly he gave us the Holy Ghost. It is imperative that we live worthy of His companionship. May the Lord bless us all. Use the tools given you and please help me to do the same. Thanks for all your encouragement and kind loving words.

Another point for the winning team

2009-06-19T02:22:00.003-06:00

So it has been a while since I have written. To all of my followers... all 3 of you.. I am truly sorry. But tonight inspiration has once again filled my heart and mind and I knew it was time to write. So let's start from the beginning... Last night I was laying in bed feeling the temptations of the adversary. I was feeling like there was no hope from escaping the temptations and I would always eventually give in. As I laid in my bed helplessly I prayed to Heavenly Father practically complaining that I am never going to overcome this awful addiction that has beset me for so many years. I told the Lord that I again needed something that was going to help me keep moving on. Something that was going to help me have my heart changed and my desire to do good restored. The answer to my prayer came. The answer to my prayer was in an odd way. But I suppose answers to prayers are not usually all that conventional. On Monday night I was talking with a friend of mine about love and how it has affected my life positively and negatively. She also expressed some of her recent feelings about love and the heartbreak that comes with it. As I listened to my friend talk I decided that something needed to be done. We needed to surround ourselves with good friends. I told her that she and I were going to go on a "super date". We were going to spend the whole day doing things that we wanted to do and not thinking about things we had to do. So we were wanting to plan something for this week, but with schedule conflicts it ended up that we were only able to catch a movie. It was a start. On the way to the movie and as the movie was starting we were caught up in the same conversation that we were in on Tuesday. Just as the movie was about to begin I told my friend that I would rather be where she is feeling pain then to be where I am and feel nothing. Then the movie began. Mind you this movie started at 12:00 am. It was the first showing in this theater and pretty much anywhere in town. My friend was anxious to see this movie. It is called "The proposal". I had no idea that a romantic comedy would be the answer to my prayer. I was riveted. The movie was exactly what I needed. I needed to feel again. This movie provided that for me. I know this sounds crazy, but I was replenished by love. Love is real. It is an intricate part of the Lord's gospel. We are commanded to love one another. I realize that this is quite cheesy... but as far as I am concerned cheesy is good. Again the Lord shows his love in a way that I never expected. Amazing that the Lord knows what we need, when we need it, and how we need it to be delivered. I guess that is another point for the winning team.

Constant reminders

2009-06-01T00:49:00.002-06:00

I was thinking today about why it is that we go to church. Why do I even bother? What do I even get out of it? A good friend of mine back a few years ago said that he has a hard time attending church because there just isn't anything new taught. I got to thinking about that today. I had a really great time in church today.. but I didn't learn anything new. In fact is was a pretty basic set of meetings. Bishop talked about the law of chastity and how we need to be better. Sunday school was about temples. Sacrament had a theme related to gratitude and the savior. So why was I so touched and moved? Why did today make a difference in my life? I came to the conclusion that today was great because I was reminded of the goodness of the Lord. I was reminded that the savior died for me. I think the key to leading a successful life is constant reminders that the Lord is there and Christ's atonement is real. I took a walk tonight after my roommate went to bed. I needed to clear my head a bit. As I soaked in the fresh Utah air and listened to some inspiring music the moon caught my eye. I just stared at the moon in awe at what an amazing creation it is. I never cease to be amazed at what the Lord's hand has created. I feel so loved.

Blessing in disguise

2009-05-18T15:39:00.002-06:00

So the other day I was thinking that I needed to get my life back on track. I was starting to slack on prayer and scripture study. The problem was, I had no motivation to do it. I was caught in the snare of laziness. Well, I decided to try to pray and tell the Lord how I was feeling. I was not expecting anything to really happen because I was basically telling the Lord that I was not committed to keeping his commandments. A couple of days went by. On Saturday night I received a phone call from a girl in my past. I was excited to hear her voice because there were some great memories and she is a really cool girl. On the other hand I was nervous because I had done some things with this girl that I was not proud of. I felt some of those old feelings coming back during the conversation. She asked me several times if we can hang out. I told her I did not think it was a good idea. I told her that I don't think that I would have the strength to not go back to those things if we were to get together. She had a hard time with that, but ultimately she was supportive. The conversation ended really well and I was happy that I made the decision not to see her. The next morning I had to work. While I was handing out medication to the boys that I work with I received a phone call. It was this girl's mother. She introduced herself and right then my heart sank. I tried not to show any emotion because I was at work. She basically told me to stay away from her daughter and that she knew all the things that are going on. I told her that I can do that. Now, this incident through off my whole day. I was feeling depressed, lonely, hurt, sad, etc. I had a really hard time with it. Toward the end of the day I started to gain some perspective. I started to think about how it felt. As I was thinking about how I was feeling I realized that the Lord had used this experience to wake me up. To bring back the motivation for change. I realized that this is not the way that I want to live my life. I don't want to feel like this all the time. What a blessing. I talked with my mother later that night and I felt her love and she was very supportive of me. It was amazing that such a trial and a challenge turned out to be such a blessing. A blessing in disguise.

Random thought

2009-05-04T02:40:00.002-06:00

Since I have this blog now I feel required to write things on it. Sometimes I just struggle with what I should talk about. I guess free hand is just my style. So the title Jaren's Thoughts is appropriate. Because this is honestly what I think about on a day to day basis. Anyway, I was sitting in church today and I was thinking about what I can be doing to improve the world. I started to think about doing seminars for free.. but who would come? I thought about asking to give a talk.. but that didn't seem right either. Then the thought came to me.. I want to run a fireside. I am not sure if it is even practical for me to do a fireside, but I want to. I guess I just want to be able to share some things that I have experienced in life and be able to discuss it with a group of people. I love to write this blog because it gives me a little sense of that. I get to express my innermost feelings without censorship. I am not sure exactly why I wrote this post.. I was just thinking about it.

Uncle Jare Bear

2009-04-29T22:59:00.003-06:00

So I was just talking to my friend Katie. We were talking about family and how our family dynamic works. As I was talking I started to think about my brother and how he is going to have his first baby soon. I couldn't help but be excited. This will be my first biological niece/nephew. As we continued to talk I started to feel kind of worried. I realized that a baby is a big responsibility. I started to wonder if I would be able to take on the responsibility. It will be some time before I have a baby, but I think I have some things I would like to get right before I am a father. Like find a wife for instance. Anyway, I cannot wait to have a little Hamel to receive into my glorious family.

Happy Valley

2009-04-25T02:33:00.004-06:00

I just got done watching the movie "Happy Valley". It has left me with a lot of thoughts. I am so grateful for the blessings in my life. I am grateful to learn from the example of others. What a blessing it is to learn from others. I see such a great need for us to bond together as people. We are all brothers and sisters. We need to treat each other as such. We are in this together. No one person is better than another. We are just on different planes. Look for those who need a hand up. Then look upward to the hand that is outstretched to you. Allow others to boost you up and boost those who need it. If you have a grudge against someone, I plead with you to let it go. You are trapped if you have a grudge. My friends.. we are supposed to be happy. If you are not, find the things in your life that are array. Set them straight. If you are looking for someone to talk to.. call me! I am more than willing to help any way I can. May we all resolve to be better. To get a copy of the video "Happy Valley" go to www.ronwilliams.org.

Be the miracle.

Challenges

2009-04-24T21:13:00.002-06:00

I got to thinking today about the challenges in life. I was talking with a friend of mine and she made a good point. She said that there is no reason to get upset when temptation comes to us. Because we are all human. Temptation comes to us in all sorts of ways. The temptations that come are all based on natural things that we desire. It is not bad to have those desires. It is all about how we channel those desires. We are not expected to be perfect. If we were the Atonement would not exist. Jesus Christ would have had no purpose. So when challenges come, be ready, and thank the Lord for them. If you have the challenge the Lord is telling you that you can make it. Trust in him.

Oh to be 15

2009-04-19T06:22:00.002-06:00

So today is my little sister's birthday. I was thinking about when I was turning 15 and how old I felt. I remember thinking how I was old enough to kiss girls (although not lucky enough), perfectly capable of driving my parents' car (although I was not yet 16), old enough to make most of my own decisions. Now as my little sister has hit 15, I have realized that 15 is certainly not old enough to do any of those things. It is interesting that just a few years can give you such a new perspective. Every year that I get older I look back and see hazards avoided, hazards I could have avoided, and I have a lot of funny stories to tell. The more that I learn in life, the more I realize I know a whole lot of nothing. The moment I start to think I got it all figured out something new falls in my lap and I have no clue how to handle it. I figure that eventually I will have experienced all that I can and I will KNOW that I have it all figured out.. then something else will come I am sure. If you feel like your life is perfect right in this moment, hold on tight because it is about to take another turn. That is the beauty of life. You never know what comes next. My dad always used to tell me, "If you want to make God laugh, tell him what you are going to do tomorrow." This life is about the journey, not the destination. Enjoy it. Can you remember the youthful bliss of 15? Good! It doesn't have to end there. Life is bliss. Challenges and struggles are what make this life worth it all. If you were not a strong person that challenge would not be yours. It would have been given to someone deemed worthy. You are worthy of the challenge. Thank the Lord for those challenges. If you are ever feeling down remember the words of the Savior, "...In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world"(John 16:33). Lean on Him, after all, He wrote the book.

"There is beauty all around..."

2009-04-18T01:09:00.001-06:00

Today I decided, once again to take control of my life. I have realized lately that I am too hard on myself. This is not the first time I have realized this. In fact, I realize this just about every day. I thought today a little bit about my journey through this life and what my role is right now. I am 23. I am about to start back at school. I have chosen a career in Behavioral Science. I thought to myself, “Did I consult the Lord about this decision?” I realized that I had yet to consult with the Lord. With this coming to mind I decided it would be a good idea for me to go down to Utah Lake. It was pretty windy and cold down there. It was quite the experience looking over the water and feeling the wind on my face. From where I was sitting I could see the Mt. Timpanogos Temple. As I sat there and listened to some music I had some thoughts. My thoughts led me to want to pray. I turned off my music and I listened to the wind blow past my ears. As I sat and listened to the wind a sense of peace came over me. I thought of the song “Love at Home”. The line that came to me was “there is beauty all around…” As I looked around and soaked in the moment I began to pray. Amidst my praying I felt some things. I felt that the Lord was telling me that all of the turmoil going on inside was all part of the process. It is important for me to have those times where I catch myself and get myself back on track. Instead of beating myself up for being off track in the first place, I need to say, “Good. I am grateful the Lord is mindful of me and wants to make sure I am on the right track.” The Lord looks for those opportunities, when my heart is open, to teach me. I have found that when I am in a state of contemplation the Lord speaks to my heart and fills my mind with words, songs, and other things that bring me back to where I need to be. It was reaffirmed to me again tonight that satan is real. He is really trying to take me down a path that leads to misery. It is ok for me to have times where I realize my faults and refocus my eyes on the Temple. The Lord knows my weaknesses and although he does not condone the things I do wrong, His love is forever with me. What a blessing it is to know that I have a Father in Heaven that loves me. Music is so powerful. On my way back from the lake I listened to a song that talked about all of the names that we give to God. The greatest name of all is still Heavenly Father. The moral of that song is that no matter the issue or challenge, He knows the way through it. What a blessing it is. I am grateful to be refocused on the Temple. I am grateful for my older brother Jesus Christ. He is my savior. How blessed I am.

First things first

2009-04-18T00:52:00.002-06:00

First things first, I want to thank you for reading my blog. I am excited to share some of my thoughts. I think they are worthwhile and hopefully so will you. I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and I am so grateful for it. I love my Savior and I know that he loves me. We have a Heavenly Father that loves us as well. I am hoping that by reading this blog you will be inspired to help others and be better yourself.. no matter your faith. I am grateful for your friendship. God be with you til we meet again.